Learning to Slow Down

by Beverly Smith

I’m in a hurry to get things done;
I rush and rush until life’s no fun.
All I’ve really got to do is live and die.
But I’m in a hurry and don’t know why.

I had the Alabama boxset. Big fan. The teenage version of me loved this song. I wanted to pick up the pace, shake hands with the clock and be on the roll ready to rock, whatever that means. Clearly, I missed the point.

Fast forward 20 years: add two kids, a big job, and modern technology that never really lets us turn-off. Now I get it.

When I had kids, the feeling of always being rushed was amplified. We’re in a hurry to eat breakfast to get to school on time, we’re in a hurry to get changed for swimming, and we’re in a hurry to brush our teeth for bed. Patience is lost on a toddler’s indecision between tennis shoes or boots, cereal or eggs. “We don’t have time for this,” we say.

Yet, it is in having kids that has made me so aware of this rush and to intentionally find time in my life to move slowly and hopefully share that with others.

Somewhere between those awkward Alabama teenage years and when my eldest daughter was born, a regular weekend generally involved getting up crazy early so we’d be the first one on the water, stripping streamers to big browns at day break and not getting off the water until it was time to pull the streamers back out at dusk. My knuckles would ache from holding onto either my rod or the oars all day long, and as I drifted to sleep on Sunday night I would feel the waves on the boat and twitch to set the hook on rising trout.

When our eldest was first born, I, of course, celebrated joyously her arrival. But, secretly a part of me mourned losing days like that. My husband and I vowed to just take her with us, but I knew deep down that we’d be fair weather anglers now, a concept I wasn’t so comfortable admitting.

We held true on our promise to each other. We took her with us. At four, she’s fished more rivers and caught more fish than many anglers will in their lifetime.

But, the truth is, if I’m honest, she’s slowed us down.

At first, this stung. We didn’t float with her on the big rivers because it was just too dangerous for an infant. We didn’t hike into places where we might bump a bear. The cast and blast scenario was now entirely off the table. But, as she’s grown, she’s slowing us down in different ways.

To spend time with my daughter outside is always an adventure.

A hike is not at all about getting from point A to B. There is a lot of stopping. Have you ever thought long and hard about what might be in that hole in the tree? She loves to fish, but it isn’t because of the fish. She builds imaginary worlds out of river rock. We find all the flattest stones for skipping. We collect the pink ones. We identify bugs. We get really dirty. And, from time to time, we catch a few fish.

Part of the work I do at Trout Unlimited is to provide opportunities for youth to get on the water. For years, I’ve espoused the virtues of this work for doing two things:

1. helping the kids – today’s kids have been diagnosed with nature deficit disorder and TU, we believe, can make a significant impact on the lives of 1,000s by getting them away from their devices and in the stream; and
2. helping TU – by introducing kids to fishing, we hope to build the bench of tomorrow’s coldwater conservationists.

But, with kids of my own now, I’m realizing that getting kids on the water does something else entirely. It helps the parents.

These days, as I go to sleep on Sunday nights, I’m not worn out in the way I was in my 20s. But, I feel full. The hours spent not rushing are just somehow fuller. Generally, I return to the rushed pace of 2017 on Monday mornings, but after my cup has been filled with outside family time, I find not only increased patience for a four-year old’s pace, but I somehow find understanding in it.

Take a que from Alabama. Move as slowly as a four-year old. Go fishing. And, when your cup is full, pay it forward. Volunteer for your local Trout Unlimited chapter. Take a neighbor fishing. Whatever it is, share this joy – unstructured, slow time on the water – with another kid, another parent. We’ll all be better off for it.

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Braided supports Trout Unlimted and partners with them on events each year. Join Braided to learn how you can get involved with Trout Unlimited.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Beverly Smith, Vice President for Volunteer Operations, Trout Unlimited

Beverly is responsible for the Volunteer Operations Department which supports 36 state councils and 380 local chapters across the country by delivering a suite of applications, trainings and resources aimed at helping volunteers more easily and effectively accomplish TU’s mission in their local communities. Her responsibilities also include managing TU’s youth education programs, veterans services partnership, and women/ diversity initiative. Beverly joined TU as the Volunteer Operations Coordinator in 2007, was promoted to Director in 2009, and Vice President in 2014. Prior to joining TU, Beverly worked for the Jackson Hole Conservation Alliance and the South Carolina Coastal Conservation League. Beverly grew up in Charleston, S.C. and received a B.A. from the University of Virginia. She lives in Jackson, Wyo. with her husband and daughters where she enjoys volunteering locally, fly fishing, and bird hunting.

To contact Beverly, e-mail bsmith@tu.org.

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